Monday morning woes

Okay it is Monday. I felt like today would never come. Part of me wished it wouldn't. I have been on progestrone for 2 days and need to have higher doubled numbers today. I took a test saturday morning, sunday mornings was def darker. I felt great about that. Then this morning it looked lighter. I am still having light cramping/ soreness. I am now completely consumed and going crazy. I go to get my blood drawn again at 9:30am. I have been praying every second since the positive test. There have been two many weird signs for this not to work out...I will be devistated.

HCG Quant 2

Wednesday July 25th: I went to the Dr again got blood drawn heard back at noon... quant was 103... after 48hours. Heart dropped into stomach. I hate this. This sucks. She said it may be just too early 1-3 weeks along to be able to see doubling. but I dont know if I buy that. I have to go in again Friday to see numbers... I will die before then. Has anyone had this issue and seen a healthy term prengnacy come from it? (((1 hour later))) Okay I was just talked down off a ledge by the best nurse and friend ever. She reassured me I know my body better than anyone and I think I implanted fridayish. And if that is the case I am 1 week pregnant in which case my numbers are great and wouldn't be doubling yet. So I will see them again Friday and pray until then. I need an icecream...LOL

HCG quant 1

Monday July 23: I went to my Primary's office and got blood drawn... It took them all day to call me back. They finally did and said quant is 83. They think I am possibly 4 weeks along. They want me to go in for repeat quant Wednesday. I feel good about this number because I feel like the dizziness was implantation Friday and so it is low but probably because I JUST got pregnant. I allowed myself to have a conversation with my husband about where the baby would go... I don't want to know the sex... what Dr what hospital?? Ugghh now I feel Jinxy.

YOUR KIDDING?!?!?!

I woke up Friday dizzy... And thought to myself I've only ever woken up dizzy when I have been pregnant. I put the thought out of my mind. How could that be?! We tried for 3 years and on treatments and accomplished two pregnancies one we lost and the other we lost a twin. Now all of a sudden I am just pregnant out of nowhere??? I can't be excited ...if I get excited I will lose the baby... I shouldn't even call it a baby yet... sh*t I am already attached to my little fuzzy walnut baby in there. I tested in the afternoon faint faint positive. I woke up Saturday morning and peed in a cup then snuck out "to the bank" (cough dollar tree) and tested in their parking lot LOL. Faint positive. Stopped at hannaford got expensive test... Brighter positive then dollar tree. I get home and grab my beautiful son out of my husbands arms as he asks me where I have been. I say we have a secret and we are not sure we want to share it... He says what? I say Jack is going to be a big brother!! He and I are both in shock that we concieved naturally and scared at the same time that it won't last. I have not found out a specific reason for my losses or preterm labor so there is no precautions I can take... I am helpless.