Sunday, May 1, 2011

Retrieval tommorow!

Retrieval tomorrow morning 8 am. No food or drink after midnight, not that i ever eat after then lol. I am getting nervous now for sure.

I got sun today reading outside with the pups and now my med hot flashes are killer. I had started getting them at church this morning and because of the slight OHHS i was super uncomfortable and standing and sitting wasn't happening i sat the whole time as to not be in too much pain. But I needed to go and pray before tomorrow. I wanted to get a blessing from the priest. I am going to say what happened and then touch on how it made me feel later. I am trying so hard to stay cool and not stress so these embies have a good home to come back to.
The priest said OF COURSE what for? And I just blurted out IVF he asked what I meant I said In Vetro Fertilization. He said he could not bless me for moral reasons... I stood there dumbfounded i am pretty sure my jaw dropped and mouth was actually open. He said he didn't know my circumstance but that multiples made on purpose were not okay, not gods will. (he obviously has no clue what IVF is) and that embryos are discarded are abortions and killing babies is not okay. But he wished me well.

I left bawling my eyes out had to walk by all the parishioners to get to my car up the street.

This is why I don't call myself catholic. I believe in the relationship with God and not the "religion". I know this is GODS plan for us. I hear his voice in my life. I would not have made it this far without his support. I may never go back to my childhood church. But like I said I don't want to stress out so I have made my peace with what I am doing, it is right and good and the only way some of us out there fighting this battle for a family are going to get one. And that is okay. Support needed in a big way right now. Hott.Mess.

6 comments:

  1. Wow. Just...wow. Big hugs, my friend. I am completely shocked by that priest's reaction. Sounds like he is uneducated about IVF for sure. I'm not catholic, so I really don't know what the church's position is there. My church leaves it up to you and God. I am glad you have made your peace with what is right for you, and I hope you feel comfort in that. Pretty tramatic for the day before retrieval. I am so sorry. Sending prayers of peace your way.

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  2. I'm so sorry -- I cannot imagine. I know it's easier said than done, but I would try to not worry too much about it. I'm a non-denominational Christian and I've found incredible support through my immediate family and friends, who share our faith.

    There is nothing cut and dried in scripture about this. I know a lot of people have hesitations about it. I've red The Infertility Companion by the Christian Medical Association. It was incredibly helpful for us.

    We've prayed about it and we feel very confident in our choices. We feel very much that everything that came together for where we are now was not by chance. For our part, we believe that God has made this possible for us, and we believe with all that we are that in the end, He is the author and giver of life.

    I'm thinking of you and sending up love and prayers for you. Relying on Him and entrusting every single aspect of this to Him has given this very high strung hopeful Mom to be some semblance of peace. Praying for the same for you...

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  3. So sorry that you got comments like that from someone who is usually a support to you... as a few catholic, I'm with you on struggling with the religion part and find it hard to swallow their beliefs about IVF. Love to you always xoxo

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  4. well, yah, most catholics dont really know what is involved in IVF and the life-giving and respecting choices that you can make. i am not surprised you got this reaction from him, and i started to say that i'm sorry you asked him, but it was worth a shot. i think it is okay to call yourself catholic and disagree on some of their positions on modern technology/issues (personal experience with that one). email me if you want to!!

    (HUG) best wishes for your retrieval!!!

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  5. I am a new reader and I'm a Christian. I think that only someone with little knowledge would say something so insensitive and unkind. I always compare this journey with someone with cancer, I know it is a much different level but not the less, if someone has cancer and the doctor does all they can do with pills, chemotherapy, radiation and there is no success but then the doctor approaches the patient and tells them about a different kind of treatment, one that not many know about but it would give them much higher chances of life. The patient would be crazy to not take that chance. The world as a whole is very uninformed about what we go through and how hard the decisions are.

    I am praying for you, for success. Relationship not religion as you said is what is key! Know and rest on the fact that all life is given of God, that means if it is one precious baby or 10, Gods word is the final authority!

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  6. Just want you to know that I'm thinking of you and anxiously awaiting your update!!! Hope everything is going well!!! Much love to you ---

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