Reflection and pictures

I am sort of working backwards with the pictures here but they are all of my little man.

This is my favorite picture of our best gift under our tree. It made my whole year to have him home for Christmas. This was the first year my heart didn't ache to have a child with me on Christmas. It was bittersweet because I wish I had all my children with me... This brings me to the thing I have been thinking about lately. His twin. I grieved my first loss fully, but when we lost Jack's twin I put aside the grief because I was so afraid he wouldn't make it through if I fell apart. So I really haven't grieved that loss, nor do I feel I have fully aknowleged that life. I named our first baby loss and I haven't named Jack's twin. I feel like if I give the twin a name then I can fully grieve the loss and move forward.

I had a few photo shoots once we were home as you can tell. He is the best gift I have ever recieved and I wanted to capture that forever.

He makes little goat noises all day it is so cute.

These are his amazing Godparents. We love them so much and we know he will too. I was so blessed and overjoyed to share the most amazing experience of my life with her. She has been my best friend since I was 5 years old... talk about truly knowing someone and being truly close with a person... I feel closer to her than to my own family. It was an opportunity I will never forget to share that with her.

And to see Nate holding my son with her makes me so excited to see them holding their own baby some day.

Our Family

Santa

My Labor shot... my favorite nurse Kaitlyn!!! She was amazing!

My NICU baby.

The second time holding him... first time I could enjoy it fully.

His first photo... He has changed so much already.












I am so in love. So grateful to God. So amazed.

Birth story Finally.

I had had contractions all night regularly ( as I had 4 nights prior as well) but they stayed regular into November 30th day which was unlike the past 4 days. But I had sent my husband to work because I was used to it. ( He was sleeping at the hospital with me and traveling 45 min to work every day)
The doctors finally saw it as a sign of possible infection so they sent me upstairs to L&D. So I was by myself...scared.. 32 weeks 2 days pregnant about to start labor and deliver n 8 week preemie baby boy. I called Jason and he left work to meet me, I also called and called my sis in law who was supposed to take video and pictures and her phone was dead and off. AHHH cue panic lol

I called my best friend since 5 years old and the godmother to my baby and she rushed right over. Jason was there by then but cleaning out my prenatal room and bringing it to the car...and by the time he came up Nicolle was there too. That was my team of support for which I am so grateful. They started my pitocin at about 9am after getting an IV finally after blowing 4 veins and finally getting one. Then they came in and drew blood and then 5 min later they came in to draw blood again... i was like you just did. They said she missed one draw so she literally had nowhere to take from and so she took from in between my knuckles on the hand with a huge hematoma from trying to get an IV. OUCH.

The contractions really started up when the girls came back with lunch and I was breathing through them eating between contractions... Nicolle tried to take my woopie pie out of my hands at one point during a rough contraction and I guess I barked Dont touch it! LOL

(pardon the fact that I don't really remember times...I was living in 60 second increments)

I made it through until it was very dark out contractions had been 2 min apart for a long long time and I was stalled at 6 for 6 hours... I finally broke down and took nubane....it is a narcotic for sure...I remember feeling like this is what it is like to be high.... my head feels detached and I was explaining my pain with metaphors about different chairs in rooms of my house... I would say ( according to him) that that was like sitting in our kitchen chairs or I'm in the living room... WEIRD!!! I remember being very focused internally the whole time until i got into a wrong position and then I needed the nubane because It hurt so bad and all of a sudden i couldn't focus inside anymore. then nubane made me feel so much better I almost wish I hadn't gotten it because when it wore off it was incredible pain. and the second and third shots didn't work.

I was still 6 UGGHH finally I said screw it I NEED the epidural. (I got a student) This was the point at which I felt the worse pain of the whole labor because the labor pain added to the poking and prodding in my spine, all I could do was sob.

2 minutes after it was in I was telling him if I wasn't married I would marry him LOL

Now I don't understand why anyone would ever go through it without one.

I fell asleep for an hour and then felt some pressure...she checked me and I was 6 ( go to hell)
half an hour later I felt more... still 6 ( get away I will do this by myself... i don't need you)
15 min later GET HER IN HERE I HAVE SOMETHING IN MY CROTCH THAT IS TRYING TO COME OUT MY BUTT!!! haha 10 and ready to push!!!!

Wait what?! I'm not ready... baby? Early? OMG...

I pushed well... maybe 15 contractions about 45 min... and he was here!!! I have to admit I was scared about how small he would be because he was so coneheaded while I was pushing I could only see a small bit of his head. When he finally came out he cried loud.. BEST feeling I will ever experience... my husband and I had a moment I will never forget and then he went over to the baby with his NICU Team. They held him up for me to see...so beautiful. And everyone was over with him just me my Dr and the attending were in my corner... I was bleeding too much...they gave me a shot in my butt and they started pushing so hard on my stomach and scooping clots out by the handful... scariest part. Then I was still bleeding too much so they gave me pills rectally ( OUCH) to stop it. They said after 2 weeks of water ruptured bed rest my uterus was too tired to contract on its own. The best moment was when the Noenatologist said to Jason I am not supposed to do this but I hear you have waited a long time for this so why don't you carry him over to mom for a second before we go upstairs. He walked to me so proud and like he was so fragile and brought him to my face so I could kiss him. We cried... then he went into the isolette and upstairs with dad...

Jack Andrew was born at 8:26 AM on December 1st. He was 5.1 and 19.5 inches when he was born and got apghars of 8 and 9!!! At 32 weeks! He had no breathing trouble.


I will write more when I can. Need to go sleep while Jack sleeps. I'm exhausted and so in love.

Quick update: 10 days old

Jack is 4lb 14oz today. He feeds every 3 hours... I am trying to teach him to breast feed he has got the technique just not the stamina yet. He is perfect in every way... we just want him home.

I am living in 24/6 and going home one night a week. I am healing well.

Jack has grown out of a few preemie outfits already :)

I sit here and dream of being home for christmas eve and christmas day with my husband dogs and precious son cuddled on the couch in pjs with yummy food and our little family. <3

Tomorrow he will be 11 days old ( 34 weeks)

Quick update: 6 days old

Jack was born at 8:26am on December 1st at 32 weeks 2 days after a very long intense labor starting 5am on November 30th. Vaginally :)

He weighed 5lb 1oz... now on day 6 he weighs 4lb 11oz.

I am in my glory. I never imagined how absolutely phenomenal this would feel.

He is such a strong little boy. He would have turned 33 weeks yesterday... we already moved out of the NICU into the CCN yesterday on his 5th day of life. Miraculously he has needed no breathing assistance at all. He is breastfeeding before every tube feeding now and he is actually getting some. He is the most precious thing in my life. I am completely over in love with him.

I get to room in with him in the CCN so I am here all the time now for every feeding and diaper change ... they let me really take over most of the care here which is so great.

I will hopefully write his birth story soon. Busy busy mommy <3

day 12 since water broke UPDATE

Okay so my contractions stopped all day yesterday besides a few randoms.

Last night they were far apart and less intense. This morning I was woken and told I have a UTI and it is resistant to the antibiotic I have been taking so I started another one. In a few days it should clear up and that will hopefully stop these contractions I have been having and we may still make it to 34 weeks!!!!!!!

Tomorrow is a big milestone...32 weeks!! And at 32 weeks 4 days (on Friday) They will measure him again ( which I am so curious for) and give me a second round of steroids!! Which I want him to get so badly.

So that is the deal for now, off high alert, still very sore and uncomfortable from these contractions. Hanging in though.

10 days post water break.. 31w 5d

Last night was horrible....

I had contractions every 4 minutes since 6pm. My dog is sick at home and she was my first baby i miss her so much and cant be there to take care of her. My water like broke again standing up to go pee this morning and I lost almost half the fluid inside. I am now an AFI6 and there isn't the criterial2x2 pocket anymore. My belly is sore and I am in a rotten mood.

I am waiting to hear what the Dr has to say but yesterday they said they are just watching and waiting until things blatantly point to infection. So here I am contracting still sitting n this bed.

Whining over. Grateful to have given him 10 extra days... hope to make it to 32 w and get another measurement of him and steroids again.

8 days past water breaking UPDATE

I had small contractions all night and this morning...they seemed to have died down now but this causes concern for possible infection. They are monitoring me closely now and I am waiting to hear from the doctor now. If they fear infection we could possibly be going upstairs to be induced tonight.

He has had 8 days longer than I thought he was going to. I have to be grateful for that even though we would love more.

I will update once Dr comes.

Day 8 post water breaking

It is Thanksgiving...I am reminded every day how much I truly have to be thankful for.

I can't believe how blessed I am to still be carrying this baby. He is all cuddled up inside with no complaints right now and I am beginning to get pretty sore in my midsection which they are watching carefully for infection. But we are here, still healthy, still pregnant. MIRACLE.

My husband is what I am most thankful for. Without him my life would hold less sparkle. He is my rock through all our trying times and this one is no exception. Even though I know how scared he is, he rarely shows it. Our son will have such an amazing role model in him.

Ou friends and family who have stood by us helping with everything you don't imagine you will need that you indeed do. They are such a phenomenal support team. We need them so much.

I am also reminded today all this could change any minute. He could become distressed, i could become infected, or i could merely start laboring again... and then he will be separated from me. Don't get me wrong all babies are eventually separated from our bodies but they usually are put to our chest. When we are separated he is whisked away directly he won't be held up and shown to me just taken into someone else's care. I know that is where I want my preemie baby to be... I just am sad that I can't do for him what he will need done. I will have to rely on strangers to do those things. And depending on my state I may not even get to see him for days. Depending on his state I may not be able to touch him for days... But regardless of all those sad things i am feeling grateful today to still be attached to my baby boy.

Day 5 post water break... 31 weeks!

I am so happy we were able to keep him in until now. I am praying every day for just one more day with him in and healthy. I had some contractions on the monitor yesterday but none this morning. Really praying hard to make it to 32 weeks for this little man.

Jason went to work today to hopefully work a short day and save some paid time for when everything starts to happen. He is 40 min away and it is a little nerve wrecking. But I have amazing friends and family that are keeping me company here and there.

Update ( 4 days after water broke)

Feeling blessed that he has been showing no distress looking happy on his monitor. No contractions that are regular or measurable really. I made it through another night pregnant. That is what I am thankful for this morning. I am still leaking fluid all day but apparently we rebuild it little by little. and even though I lose it as long as he is staying stable and we show no signs of infection we are going to try and stick together and cook for another 3 weeks one day until we are 34 weeks. Then the risks out way the benefits and we will deliver our little baby boy.

I pray every minute that we can make it there. We will see what the day holds.

I am so thankful for all the prayers and thoughts and good wishes for my family. And all the visitors :)

Thank you Sicotte/ Eaton Families for the Preemie and Newborn clothes!!

Thank you Julia and Nicolle for helping us with loving and taking care of our furbabies!!!

I will update tonight if the day changes anything.

**Update 30 weeks 4 days ( 24 hrs after water broke)

So they took an ultrasound this morning and I have a level 2 amniotic fluid... (most people 8-20) so i basically lost it all. But I am not having any contractions...he is measuring 4.8 lbs today but the fact that he is large is probably due to gestational diabetes and most likey will work against and not for him according to the NICU dr I spoke with today.

He through a lot of what we may most likely see him go through and be hooked up to. That was scary but helpful. I feel lucky to have been able to listen to it and absorb it and not after he was born and i was to much in shock to hear it.

So we are a bit prepared for a premmie delivery.

I didn't however get seen by my dr today like we were expecting. I am trying not to be super pissed but instead taking it as a good sign that we werent high enough priority.

In small small almost meaningless news I blew a vein in my hand from an iv and it hurt. It seems stupid to say but it is the only real update I have lol. I have a new one in my arm...much better.

Hopefully I will update tommorow after seeing my dr.

please keep praying for us we need it all.

IN NEED OF PRAYERS

I am admitted to Maine Medical center. 1 hour away from my home because they have a great NICU. I lost all my water yesterday. I just had an unltrasound there is barely any in there. I am waiting for the doctor to come in after seeing the US results to tell us our plan of action. I am only 30 weeks 4 days and not ready to deliver him this prematurely. There plan before the US results were to hopefully get me to atleast 32 weeks bedrest in hospital constant monitoring. I already recieved one steroid shot and i get the second one at 3:30 pm today. I am praying for atleast 2 or 3 more days to give the steroids full effect. But if without infection or complication I could go a few more weeks I would love to hit their goal or beyond as long as we can do it safely.


Any prayers are much appreciated we are so scared and trying to remember to trust is god and his plan for us and for Jack.

Pinch me

WEIRD I just found this draft I wrote right before my shower and water breaking... I thought I would post it because it is cool to see what I was thinking before I knew everything was about to change......


I am 29 weeks 4 days pregnant...just shy of 30 weeks. That feels like birth is so close now. I can hardly believe how lucky I am that I am still growing a healthy baby in me. I am looking very pregnant these days. I am feeling the pulls and strains on my uterus and ligaments. Jack has had hiccups 4 times now...what an interesting and different feeling. I still have morning sickness every morning. I wake up to a bottle of zofran and pop a pill first thing every morning. That seems to keep me from puking.





My DH has moments lately where he says God you look so pregnant right now with a big smile on his face ( like this morning). At the grocery store the other day I was in line at the deli and when I walked back to him at the cart he kissed me and said I just had the coolest moment when I looked over for you and it was like OH YAH we are having a baby...my wife is pregnant! SO SWEET. I love this man more than anything and he will make such a great daddy.





I have been very nesty lately and have cleaned the nursery and washed all the hand me down 0-3 months and folded them and put them in Jack's Drawers. Also I have arranged the crib and changer/dresser where I want them and put his wall stickies on (Jack Andrew and his grasshoppers and polka dots). I have a few frames to hang and a few projects to do still, some of which I will keep myself busy with today. But I am getting anxious to know what we will have left to buy for baby after the surprise shower my mom is throwing. I don't know any of the details except that it will be Jack and Jill (no pun intented) which I love because I want to share that moment with Jason. I cannot even imagine that we are really going to have one because it is still so surreal that we are actually going to have a baby. I have all the fixings to make a patriots quilt...but the last few games have been toilet water and it hasn't inspired much...also a patriots tag toy...but like I said... toilet water.





Hopefully I will pull it together and get them done in the next couple weeks. :)





Here is an updated belly pic and (haircut!!!) the nursery so far.





CONGRATS TO BABY HOPES AND HILLARY!!!!!!! I have and will be praying for healthy complication free pregnancies. xoxo

Nap time Update

So it is nap time and that means I get to reflect and relax a bit...At least today that's what I am making it mean :)

I am amazed ever.single.time. Jack rolls around in there, or wedges and punches himself up into my ribs.

When he isn't moving it is like I forget this huge fortune I have been bestowed and then he moves again and I am humbled by this amazing blessing all over again.

I just spent last weekend buying my first bottle of Dreft and washing all the hand me down clothes I have received from some generous friends of friends. I folded them all and took in every adorable little piece. Smelt the little NFL pants...and Teddy Bear Bunting. Then I had a kitchen table FULL of clothes and was like what do I do now....hmm.... OH YAH I will go put them in his drawers...then it HIT ME. These are for my baby, Jack, That I am still miraculously carrying in my womb. And it was overwhelming and surprising.

Needless to say I have been saying lots of Thanks for this pregnancy and making it this far.

I woke up in a cold sweat 2 nights ago at 3am when my husband got up to let the dogs out. Because I JUST REMEMBERED we have our first birthing class tonight and 3 Tuesdays after that. Luckily Hubs got the time off and the daycare moms are picking up a bit early the next 4 Tuesdays for me :)

So yah tonight is my first birthing class...OMGee.

27 weeks 1 day....

AHHHMAZING

New symptoms.. dealing with gestational diabetes constantly, leg and hip pain and numbness, sleep interruption, frequent night time urination, pelvic pain, breasts leaking.

All worth it, each one new and interesting.

I am looking forward to the Holidays finally being the one who can take a cute belly shot with my adoring husband in front of the turkey and Christmas tree. I am also looking very much forward to my last year at home handing out candy.

I am starting to feel the urge to nest, and that urge has me realizing we have to start buying all the little things we will need for his arrival. I want to have a bag packed by 30 weeks to make sure I am ready no matter what. That is three weeks away and I feel like we have nothing. I know that isn't true, I also know my mom and I'm sure family and friends are planning a surprise shower for us and so I know we won't be starting from scratch but I feel the need to be ready NOW. haha prebaby anxiety I'm sure.

I have a visit coming up with my husbands hilarious cousins from mass on November 11th-13th. I am very excited to see them and can't wait to decorate a fancy cake with them for fun! (one is in a cake making class)

That's all nap time is almost over and I will leave you with a recent belly shot...26 weeks.

In front of the bookshelf my stepdad made Jack.

And just a day later I felt three times bigger <3

Fnger Painting with a 16 month old

I decided to go oldschool on this project and do finger painting... a good 'ol fashioned fridge art project. Again I filled his belly before we started. And for this project get down to the diaper.

You will need some paper and washable non toxic paint.

I literally squirted more paint as he used needed it. He loved it and did great. He kept it on the paper and out of his mouth. I tried this with a 14 month old little girl and she went straight to her mouth with the paint...that was over quick. haha

So this project completely depends on your baby.

He was very proud of the finished product. :)

Fall Kids Craft: Hand Leaf Wreath (5 years and up)

For the Hand Leaf Wreath you will need...
Glue (modge podge)
brush
paper plate (with center cut out)
Scissors
pencil
construction paper
Gold Marker
First take your child and trace their hand (or let them) on multiple colors of paper.

Then cut all the hands out with them.

Have them draw the vein of the hand leaf on with a decorative marker.



Then glue them all around the paper plate and modge podge over them all for luster.

After this loop a peice of yarn, ribbon, or string through to hang it up for fall!!!

Failure

I had my gestational diabetes test today and failed. They don't like it over 130 and i was 151. Boooooo. I don't know if this is super high or what but I had an empty stomach when I took it so she seemed surprised and the number. Now I have to schedule my 3 hr and I want to pass and not have GD so badly. I have been crying for a while.

I hate to have a pity party for 2 seconds but... why can't I just enjoy this like everyone else. I don't want to have extra risks or diets.

pity party over. Anyone fail one hour with these numbers and pass 3 hr??? What did you do to increase your chances of passing the second time around?

24 weeks tomorrow

I will be 24 weeks tomorrow and if he is growing the way he was 4 weeks ago and 2 weeks ago he is probably measuring over 25 weeks...I am going to have a BIG healthy baby!!!

I have a doctors appointment early tomorrow and my Gestational Diabetes testing...I am nervous for this because of the growth and size of Jack right now. And because I am higher risk for this with PCOS. we will see...

Whats new...Jack is a kick boxer in there and he has shared his kicks and punches with lots of family and friends the past two days. I am in love with his every movement. I think it is so cool that we can feel him from the outside now.

Today I realized if they change my due date like they keep thinking they will I will be due Jan 15th. and if that happens it is only like 4 months away!!!!! I can't wait to meet him and see his sweet face.

Picture post!!!

Me and My Boy Jack at 20 weeks!!

We made tissue paper flowers

And a super cute banner!!!

The cutest Zebra hat auntie Coley got for Jack

Its JACK

Me, Mrs Behne and Mrs Eaton

Team Carly

Everyone who came out to supprort us. Thank you!!

Team Jack

After the ultrasound 2 weeks ago we bought a little pumpkin to dram a Jack O'Lantern face on for the reveal. Here are Jack's Godparents and us at the reveal. We all had guessed Boy. (LOVE the blue "gummy" bear shirts!!!)

Today this was Jack's profile...He is measuring over a week ahead 24 weeks even and 1 lb 6oz ALREADY lol. Big boy!!

I cried for the first time in a while at an ultrasound today when I saw this sweet button nose.

I don't think this really has hot home yet that we are going to have a baby.

HIIIIII MOMMMMYYYY!!!!

Boy shot....it is definately a boy lol.

We are having a ....

BOY!!!

Jack Andrew
I am so happy and excited! Our ultrasound appointment went well. It took an hour and a half though to get the money shot. I had to flip flop all over the table to get that picture and there was a little bulge!!! ( my husband says it is an average size bulge hahaha)

We had our Gender reveal party which was super cute and fun. I appreciate feeling the excitement and love and support from all our family and friends. Jason and I could really have been this completely exstatic either way but it is a different feeling to have a baby of the opposite sex. I am woried about all the boy stuff I know nothing about. Jason thinks I am ridiculous for worrying and asking so much about things like puberty and hormones and boy thoughts and worries and relationships and his sex talks. He says we have plenty of time but I would just feel so much more comfortable if I was well prepared.

In other news... I quit my job and am starting a daycare next week I start with my first 2 kiddos and as soon as my liscence comes in I will be taking more. I am very excited about this change as it means I will be home with Jack and have dinner on the table for my husband every night. And my pups will have people around all week :) All good things to come.

Jack is a mad man in the womb. He moves all the time. I love it!!!! When he rests for a few hours it drives me crazy... I still have all the IF and loss fears and worries.


The next post will be all photos of the little man and party. I just wanted to type up a quick update for all my followers...thanks for sticking with me through the dry spell :)

The big reveal

So it is officially less than a week from my anatomy scan and a week exactly until our gender reveal party.

I AM SO EXCITED to see what we are cooking in there.

I switched hospitals last week. I am now going with a midwife and thinking about a water birth or atleast labor in the tub. The hospital is amazing but the midwife is spectacular. They have a rocking chair in the room for you to sit in while you and your midwife talk every appointment. It is so nice. She asked me what my vision for my babys journey into the world is? I have never had a dr ask me what I wanted before. I am in love with her.

She got me in next week for my 20 wk aptmt and Friday the 9th for my anatomy scan!!! YAY
we are still planning on not finding out at the aptmt but we will see what happens neither one of us want to turn our heads for even a second.

I don't know if i am crazy or still in disbelief that 2 babies are now only one but I feel upper left movement and lower right movement and i swear on the Doppler i get two different heartbeats.
I did the needle on a string gender test yesterday and I SWEAR it did nothing in the middle of my belly but on the right it did back and forth (boy) and on the right circles (girl) I think that is so so weird!!!!

I even recorded it on my phone.

I will post a 20 week picture this upcoming week!!!

18 week update

I am 18 weeks 4 days pregnant and in awe. I am loving every exauhsting and elating moment. I was in my best friend's wedding as the Maid of honor last weekend and it was amazing. The look on her husbands face as he saw her coming down the aisle for the first time looking like a supermodel angel was priceless. I will never forget the emotion of that day.

They are going to have a wonderful happy life together, and will be the best godparents to this baby I am carrying that we could ever ask for :)

I hope they are enjoying their honeymoon despite the cancelled cruise to the bahamas because of that Bitch Irene.

CONGRATS NEWLYWED EATONS!!!

We are planning a gender reveal party for September 17th at my house. I am thinking I want it to be a brunch type thing now so we can go buy something for boy or girl in the afternoon. And my hubby got the 18th off so we can REGISTER!!! This is so exciting. The UNexciting part is that our anatomy scan is on the 12th and we have to wait all week for that envelope to be opened and tell us who we are expecting...Jack or Carly???

Here is the 18 week pic.

Im a loser of a blogger

I am so sorry. I have not been posting like a good blogger should. Pregnancy has taken over my brain and my life. I love every second of it to pieces but I cant find time for online things right now.
Also the other half of my brain and life is consumed gleefully by my best friends wedding. It is only 7 days away now and I CAN"T WAIT. It is going to be so fabulous. She has DIYed everything. Her living room is wedding central. I know she is so ready for the day to be here. I have started trying to write my speech. But what can you say when someone has been such a huge part of your life and this is one of the biggest days in theirs. I cry when i say the word speech never mind actually writing one or READING one. OMG I am praying for dry eye syndrome the day of.
Nate is such a wonderful man. I am so completely happy for her and for him, he got the best girl he could have.

Off to spend the last weekend before the wedding with the Bride doing all the last minute things. I will leave you with my 16 week belly shot..Perfectly tells you how I am feeling this week EXAUHSTED (sitting in the recliner)

15 weeks

I cannot believe it when another weeks goes by and i am still pregnant. I am in love with the acrobat inside.

Still nauseous but it is more like every third day now. My aversions are the things I had to have every day when I wasnt pregnant. I used to have dessert every night mostly icecream. Now i look forward to a meal and truly only eat dessert when I am attending a bday party.

I have been trying to eat all organic fruits and veggies.

I am feeling a flutter here and there.

I have an appointment next week!!!!

And we are planning a gender reveal party for September 17th. SO excited to find out the sex.

Car Accident

This morning on my ride to work I rearended someone who stopped on a dime so they wouldnt rear end another person who turned without a blinker.

It was terrible. I tightened up slammed on the breaks and hit her. I was crying and freaking out. I am 15 weeks pregnant with a miracle IVF baby and something so stupid can happen in a second and take it all away from us. The seatbelt tightened around my lower abdomen and by the time the cops arrived (an hour after i called) I was very crampy and starting to get super nervous. The other woman was okay. She was a sister of some sort and prayed with me for the baby as we were leaving to go to the hospital. I am convinced now that something worse would have happen had I continued my route to work today...instead God sent a religious woman for me to rearend and pray for me before I got checked out to be okay.

We got to the ER and nobody was there we got right in. I lost another pound. Still have been pretty sick so... makes sense. All my vitals were good strong heartbeat for the baby. And then they did an ultrasound....UNBELIEVABLE. The baby was kicking and punching and flipping... It was priceless, Jason screamed HOLY SHIT did you see that!!! he kept commenting on the profile of our small baby. nose mouth eyes sucking thumb taking gulps of fluid. rolling around so we could see the spine, the feet, the long legs and arms all five fingers. I was in awe and so glad baby was okay. I was so worried I might see a picture of a baby with no movements and heartbeat. I am so blessed. A true reminder how precious everyday of this pregnancy is.

thank you God.

Belly pics and 13 week 1 day update

12 week belly pic!

I had to show how many stretch marks I have gotten since the pregnancy started

First purchase this pregnancy...My diaper bag :)



Second purchase, first big purchase...Dresser/changer. The nursery so far.

Today 13 weeks 1 day belly pic!!

I have been sick all day and now have a massive headache. I havent found anything that soothes the nausea yet....any ideas???

13 weeks tommorow

I cant even believe that! How crazy... we are in the second trimester.

The second trimester!!! I am crying typing this. I felt the baby flutter a few times today. It is glorious. It is the smallest feeling but it is magnificent. I never thought I could make it this far.

The nausea isnt gone but it is less than it was. Headaches are in full force right now. The extra flem/ saliva is killing me. Cravings are too :) My husband makes the best apple crisp!

We had another milestone, and bought the dresser changer. So now the nursery has a crib all set up with bedding and a dresser changer.

We have another dr appt at 16 weeks. That feels like a long time in between appointments.
That makes me feel unsettled, but the doppler helps. My nightly routine now is to hear the heartbeat and a nightly tai-bo session. Active baby :)

12 Weeks

I don't know why but this feels like the biggest milestone for us. I am starting to come out of the constant nausea KNOCK ON WOOD. I am coming into the extreme fatigue. My Husband has been absolutely wonderful. He is waiting on me hand and foot. Worries about everything. Took my nail polish away because he thought it would be bad for the baby, hhaha but even funnier...I Went to the ocean the other day and before I left he said you wont go in the water will you??? I said umm yah, and he said are you allowed to go in the ocean?? I said YES why?! He said i dont know...Ocean monsters...hahahahahahaa. SO CUTE.

My nipples are growing along with everything else and now they are dry and so so so itchy. UGG that's the worst. does anyone else experience this with their pregnancies?? I had this last time before the miscarriage too.

The crib is set up and the medicine fridge is out. I am now at the point where I would like to give away my extra meds. I have some follistim, 2 boxes of Menapur, and extra needles and sanitary wipe things. If anyone is interested please let me know and give me your private email so i can mail them to you.

Thursday I have my first official ob appointment. I hope to see my gummy bear again. If I had to guess I would say I have a pink ballerina in there. The heartbeat on the Doppler is 170-167 consistently.

My boobs are porn star quality now. they have gone up 2 sizes. my nails are strong and long and beautiful for the first time ever, and my super thick hair is even thicker.

I love my baby so much already. I cant wait to meet him or her. I listen to the heartbeat like 2 times a day at least and imagine what it will be like to hold that little piece of me and Jason. Close to my chest, rocking, singing sweet lullabies to My Baby* oh my gosh. It brings me to tears just to think about it.

Bistos, Hi Bebe

I just got gifted a Bistos Hi-BEBE doppler. And I have heard my baby's heartbeat three times today :) (170)

I got to show my husband for the first time what our baby sounds like in there. Best moment ever. It makes all the sickness and symptoms worth it completely.

I love my baby (I think it is a girl)

Good day

Not too nauseas... sunny and water was nice had the whole morning at the pool.... Still pregnant. Life is Good today!!!

Animal attacks and Dead bodies

Today was a day spent with my best friend getting ready for her wedding. It started out with the worst Morning sickness I have had to date...KNOCK ON WOOD. I actually threw up today. I hate feeling sick all the time, and I especially hate throwing up.
We went to Pedal Pushers Garden Place to drop off the containers for her succulent centerpieces and check out the cutting garden because she planted all her flowers by now they are starting to pop up!!! That is when the first attack happened, a sly gardener snake. I may or may not have cussed like a sailor.
Then as we sat down in front of the shop to get all the details for pickup set Danielle was almost attacked by a mother bird guarding a nest near by. It slow motion came at her face then flew to the side of her and pooped. She and her mother have a fear of birds anyways, I am pretty sure she will have nightmares tonight.

Then leaving the shop to head home this HUGE turtle was in the road so I got out to do my civic duty and grabbed his shell and he swatted me with his dinosaur paw so i shooed him off the road into the water...He moved fast!!! I thought no turtles could run. MYTH BUSTED!!!Then after scarfing lunch as to not throw up again I went to see my bestie in her show Wait until Dark. It was a murder mystery about a blind woman. My bestie played the dead body. She did great. Made me proud haha. Then we finished our day at walmart buying fishing leurs for butenieres. A very productive day despite my baby's growth causing a mini war in my body. I love you baby...take it easy on mommy. xoxo